The first sentence that entered my mind when I set about beginning this post was, "It's been so long, I can barely remember how to work this thing." It's only a marginally better way to begin a blog post than it is a pick up line, but I'm going to run with it. I mean, fuck. What does it matter? By now everything is all Twittery, and even a blog post is too time consuming to consume. I remember all the times I'd beat myself up for apply energies to something as ephemeral as a blog. I'm talking seconds upon seconds of guilt. Now, the idea of committing more than five words to anything seems like building an ark. Clearly, my days of demanding high dollar sponsorships and nude photos from readers are over.

Or have they just begun?

Whilst we ponder that, I proffer this, a Christmas wish list:

Ten Things Every American Family Wants in Their Stockings this Christmas, and Excluding My Hands

1. Ammunition.
2. Tickets to that which will unburden us of our worries and allay our very souls -- Jim Carrey's The Yes Man.
3. A note from God reading, "Gotcha!"
4. A trade.
5. Anything distracting.
6. A wormhole back to the good old late '70's.
7. A stocking.
8. A draft notice.
9. An envelope full of Mexican pesos.
10. Coal.

Analogcabin @ 11:18 AM
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